Reflections

Victim or Perpetrator?

I happen to be a great believer in Justice, and the one thing guaranteed to rile me up is perceived injustice, especially that about which I can do nothing.  I hate feeling powerless! I hate sitting here, watching things happen, and being unable to do a thing about them!  And yet I often find myself in that position…

Don’t get me wrong, I will do my part, when I can, to make a difference.  And I have spent most of my adult life confronting and opposing victimization, both victimization caused by others and self-victimization; you know, that negative self-talk, self-sabotage, procrastination and downright cowardice that prevent me from reaching the goals I set for myself.  The problem comes in recognizing the difference, and knowing when, and how, to best fight it…

Take the last two days, for example.  Yesterday, I was on a high unlike anything I’ve felt in a while.  I’d taken a pilgrimage with a friend to a sacred place of mine, and “miraculous” things happened around every turn!  I felt empowered, inspired, and motivated to get on with my life, and my life’s work.  And today, when the work should have begun, I was confronted with several disempowering situations over which I have absolutely no control, leaving me hopeless, helpless, and inept…

So, if it’s true that we create our own reality, that we manifest our deepest desires, consciously or not, then which of these two days represents the most accurate reality of mine?  Am I ultimately in charge of my life and destiny, or am I merely a pawn in someone else’s plan?  Am I a victim in a world over which I truly have no influence or control, or am I the perpetrator seeking to keep myself down?

In a Universe where all of us are equally important facets of the One, the Divine, whose interests should take precedence over others?  Just curious, I guess…

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