I wrote this last spring after a particularly compelling meditation/dream. In that experience I had birthed my new self, while also reliving my daughter’s birth (my only child). And there was a nagging hint that my daughter would soon birth a daughter, making it 3 generations of woman-hood: Maiden, Mother and Crone.
Since then, I have discovered my daughter is pregnant, expected to birth a daughter in early May 2016. And I have seen my own self transformed…
I had forgotten all about this until today, rummaging through my draft folder (apparently I had typed it up here and thought I might one day share it). Re-discovering it today… well, I thought, perhaps, it is finally time to share it…
This, then, was the vision…
I hold you in my arms, sweet girl child of mine
For so long I carried you
Inside my womb, and now
I see you, I touch you, I know you
Sweet girl-child of mine…
And, as I look you over this first time,
I notice that cord still joins us,
You and I
Two faces, one Being still.
I place you gently on the altar of my heart
Where you shall always be
I love you even more now than before
I labored for your birth.
For now I see you with my eyes
Touch you with my hands
Recognize you as your own being
While still being part of me…
I am caught up in this moment
In the perfection that is you
Perfect little fingers will one day build a world…
Perfect little toes will soon be buried in the dirt…
That perfect button nose will crinkle at unfamiliar scents
And sniff out new adventures.
Slowly you open those almond shaped eyes
And stare right back at me.
Just perfect love and trust.
I see nothing now but those beautiful eyes
Prisms of light through my shimmering tears
Feeling the weight of responsibility for you
Is what I was meant to do…
Everything I’ve ever done
Everything I’ve ever been.
Everything I’ve ever wanted.
Cast in a perfect human form.
I lift you high above my head
An offering to the gods of love
A solemn promise to care for you
To nurture you
To protect you…
And I am done.
I pull you close, rest that auburn head against my breast
For I cannot bear the separation anymore.
And suddenly I notice, once again,
The presence of that cord.
We are One still,
And ever will be.
I have birthed you, sweet child of mine.
I have created you:
Lent you my body
And my form.
And now I honor your presence with all that I am
I swaddle you with my love.
And yes, sweet child of mine
I see you as you are
And having met you now,
I recognize you
As I am you, you, too are me
Re-birth of a girl-child
The birth of my soul…