Dreams, Essay, Reflections

“Step by…

… stumbled half-step twist and slip.”

Order matters sometimes…

Not that I’m not a big fan of chaos, of course.  And sponteneity.  And walking blind into unknown territory, for these are all concepts and activities that I have embraced myself, many times.  And truthfully, I look forward to them most of the time.  Because it’s fun, and exciting, and a thrill-seeker’s joy to be “out there” working without a map or a net…  Adrenaline rushes can be powerful lures…

But still, order matters sometimes…

Because adrenaline rushes are often accompanied by actual pain, physical and/or psychological.  That’s the point, after all;  adrenaline is the body’s way of pushing on when in fight or flight mode.  It allows us to carry on when we are injured, or exhausted, terrified to our core, but we absolutely must continue in order to survive.  But it’s a temporary solution, always.  If we do not find safe refuge before those reserves run out, we will fail.  It is inevitable…

So if those adrenaline rushes precede the actual danger we face, we significantly reduce our chances of success.  At least in those cases where rest cannot intervene between the two.  And in a world where thrill seeking is almost a way of life, our risks are magnified by our inability (or unwillingness) to slow down…

So, yeah…  order matters sometimes…

Take that “message” I received the other day, which said, in part: “…the same words, slightly different order, significantly different meanings…”

Or this dream fragment from this morning.  In the dream someone was reciting poetry (or prophecy), only a single stanza of which I could remember upon wakening.  And in that stanza, I was uncertain of the order of the first two lines.  It was either:

“…And there came into their midst a prophecy… and then there were three.  By the time they were done…  there were none…”


“…and then there were three.  And there came into their midst a prophecy…  By the time they were done…  there were none…”

So, yeah… order matters sometimes…

You may not personally care whether the chicken or the egg came first, but how you answer that at any given point says much about you internally.  And externally, as well.  For all of Life, all experience circles and cycles in that way, and determining “where” we are can significantly impact where we are “going.”

If it is true that our “selves” are the sum total of our experiences, and that All experience occurs simultaneously, then how we pick and choose that experience, and the order we experience it in matters.  Hence the relevancy of Time, for Time is nothing if not a means of classifying and ordering our experiences.  Not the only means, to be sure, but a most common and effective one we all use…

Without such structure, and the order it brings, we would be hopping about, experiencing, but unable to draw conclusions, or “learn” anything.  Though, perhaps that’s not necessarily a bad thing.  After all, I’m not here to “judge” any one’s journey, even my own, I suspect.  Still… am I truly ready to abandon all such order in my “life?”

Placing my self on the circle of Life determines a “starting” point, and a direction for my wanderings.  Determining “forward” and “backward” seems somehow important to me…

So, yeah… order matters sometimes.

Except when I used to dance, of course, and then order wasn’t nearly so important.  Forward, backward, side-to-side, direction was irrelevant; the rhythm was all that truly mattered then.  The cadence, the step, the swirl and turn; the Movement itself was the pleasure earned…

So yeah…  order matters sometimes…

And then sometimes… it doesn’t…


11 thoughts on ““Step by…

  1. Hi Lisa.
    Your words reminded me of my career in the UK Civil Service which was supposed to be order, but tended to work best when there was chaos, and if too much order was imposed then the systems tended to slow down and get cranky.
    (In my latter days under the guise of being over 60 and thus obviously ‘getting odd’, I used to tease my younger colleagues by proclaiming ‘Yeah, you see Reality is over-rated)
    I work in a sort of order in my day, but my writing world thrives on chaos.
    I think you have highlighted here the importance of a balance betwixt the two. Particularly in the creative world(s).
    Best wishes

    Liked by 1 person

      • Oh the balance swings this way and that, and finally settles down.
        All eventually will be well.
        (In my final years at HM Govt I reckoned our primary instruction books should have been’ Alice in Wonderland’ & ‘Catch-22’ with selected extracts from Kafka & Peanuts

        Liked by 1 person

  2. Deep thoughts, oh the adrenaline.

    And the times it was useful, and the times it wasn’t. My poor adrenals are now needing a complete makeover, and luckily I have found out how, little by little.

    I was listening to Susan Weed last night and she said that all living beings are always in a state of dynamic disequilibrium.

    If we are completely balanced, then we aren’t even alive.

    Now, that was some great news!

    It’s awesome to see you here, Lisa.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Lack of order leads to chaos. Chaos is entropy and entropy is the complete death of a complex system (of two or more parts) when all the energy within that system has been used up in useful work and that same energy is now inert. Well, that’s how I describe it for myself, best look it up: entropy. Here’s another “home grown” way to describe order. Take the famous glass of water. It sits on a table and there’s water in it exactly to the half way point. Is it half full or half empty? The twisted mind of a psychiatrist (or is it a psychologist, I get those two critters mixed up – maybe deliberately since I hold them on a par just below lawyers and politicians) will say, it all depends on your attitude, negative or positive? Negative: it’s half empty. Positive, it’s half full. Incredibly ignorant observation. The proper observation has to do with order. If the glass was being filled, it’s half full. If the glass was being emptied, it’s half empty. That’s it, no mystery, no New Agey gobbledygook necessary to explain anything.
    We live in a dualistic universe, hence we need order for it to function. For example, light and dark. To “see” we need light to strike an object, creating shadows. We locate the object through shadows and shadows need light to bring them out. When light and dark get all mixed up we end up with a totally grey landscape with no definition. I remember going on day treks in blizzards up north. Kids need excitement, and getting lost in a blizzard seemed just the thing. It was scary, that’s why we’d do it. Imagine a landscape with nothing in it but a grey expanse of swirling snow (it appears grey because it reflects the clouds, not the sun) and all you have to go by is your gut feeling that “this way” is the right way. A blizzard is chaos, where everything is mixed together: sky, land, and fields. It’s even more disconcerting than fog because with fog you can look at the ground, find indications of which way is which from the way plants bend, footprints, paths. In a blizzard, it’s all grey-white motion – no plants, no paths, no fences, no trees, no sky above, no land beneath.
    Your dance example when you say “except” will, cadence is still order… Order comes in many shapes and sizes. Nature demonstrates order and different forms of energy chase each other over the land and the seas. Weather patterns may remain enigmatic to man, but they are not to the earth. It has a kind of order that baffles man, hence why man increasingly moves away from nature’s order to create his own entropic pockets of artificial order. Well, this was fun, as was reading your own cogitations that got mine going. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    • Love this, Sha’Tara! Especially about the glass; makes me want to say, “uh duh!” Lol!

      And I agree that order is everywhere in nature, though it takes different forms. I believe that to be true of the “self” as well; what method we use to order our experiences determines a lot about how we experience that “self.” And we are not limited to a single method… ever.

      Love you, Sha’Tara, and your wisdom and your thoughts, and your humor… well, you get the idea, I think! 😉

      Liked by 1 person

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