Reflections, Visions

“Field of Grass: The Vision Continues…”

And so it began…

I am walking in a field of tall grasses that grow as far as I can see,  like a green/brown ocean all around me.  The tips are dancing in a gentle breeze, creating waves upon this earthy sea…

To my left is a forest, all hazy and dark, a living presence I only acknowledge as I pass…

I am walking toward a setting or rising sun, though I have no sense of time to tell me which it is, for it appears only as a burning red disc behind a shelf of tall clouds.  All of the sky reflects that red, blending it seamlessly with oranges, and pinks, and hints of blue…

I am at peace.  And yet poignantly aware of the blurred outlines distorting everything I see.  It occurs to me it must be very hot or humid today, since the very air I breathe is sparkling with waves of heat, and water vapor…

I reach out my arms to either side, trailing my hands through the tall grasses, eager to feel their softness tickling my skin.  And it is then that I notice I’m not feeling anything…

I cannot feel the grass on my hands.  I do not feel the breeze that is playing with it.  I sense none of the sunlight upon my exposed skin…  In fact, I feel no-thing!

Startled, I come awake, wondering why this is?  I realize it is not peace that has been filling me, but an emptiness so full of nothing that I feel completely satisfied.  But now that I am aware, I know I have no physical needs, for I am neither cold nor hot, hungry nor thirsty; I am, but I am no-thing…

Confused, I ask myself, “Am I dreaming now?…  Or am I dead?”

***

And so it continues…

All around me a buzzing sound, growing louder with each step I take.  The very ground beneath my feet vibrates to the same refrain.  The forest to my left becomes more present… and more welcoming…  offering safe refuge from all that is pursuing me…

I look ahead once more, focusing on the horizon before me, and I realize that the clouds are forming into something recognizable to me…

A city rises before my eyes, but it is a city unlike any I have ever seen before…

Beautiful…  Pristine…  Clean…

Graceful…  Elegant…  Serene…

It calls out to me…  Beckoning…

My war weary spirit reaches for it eagerly…

And then I hear the whispering…  all around me:

“Come home, child…  You can come home now…”

Tears rise within me in response to those voices,

and the love that resounds…

reverberates…

resonates…

and echoes with each breath I take.

And suddenly that heavenly city is right above me.  I know I can reach it…  almost…  if I just stretch my self a little bit…

So I dig my toes into the rich earth beneath me, seeking leverage.  And strength.  I allow my consciousness to sink deep, driving my self down until I find myself tangled with the roots of the forest trees…

Then upward I push with all of my being…  Reaching…  Climbing…  Soaring…  Up to the city rising far above me…

My arms follow my thoughts, lifting Me higher.  Embracing the goal I have set my sights on…  I breathe deeply, one last time, releasing that breath in a long, lingering sigh…

“Welcome home, child!,” the voices cry, and the joy that I feel nearly overwhelms me.  But I am strong as an Oak, and as flexible as the wind, so there is no danger that such emotion will unmoor me…

For I have become what I was always meant to be.  What I have always been, but forgotten how to be.  I am a bridge between.  Between what has been, and what will be; between what “I” want, and what “you” need.

I have reclaimed my identity…

And today…

Today I am a Birch Tree…

Or am I a Willow instead?

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